To expose the thin line between non-violent acting and self-defending a closer look at the definition of violence is required. For example: in the case of civil disobedience a chain of burning tyres on a road might appear some among us as a use of violent measures by risking car accidents. Self-defence implies primarily an act of violence but especially the in the East Asian teachings the offender‘s violent energy will be turned back to its‘ source. But there are situations where each one of us is getting urged to use violence, the classical worst case scenario, a really bad guy is pointing a gun at your child, ready to fire, and your only chance to take him down is to shoot him. Just remind that you hadn‘t the intention to kill him but only the goal to stop him before he fires at your offspring. You always have to be aware that self-defense is pushing you if necessary to your outer limits.
With that knowledge having in your mind it‘s much more easier handle your attitude towards avoiding taking in the extreme case some other‘s life. Unless we aren‘t professional killers and don‘t belong to a special squad of the police or military branch our everlasting hope is never to come in such a situation. It‘s our inner ethical border proven and as long as we feel it accepting its‘ existence we walk on the right side. A murder hasn‘t this border, maybe it‘s naturally not given or he has lost it due to a deep traumatic experience in his lifetime.
Today‘s dilemma is that a civilized society generally excludes violence printing a huge taboo label on it - but everyone of us has a dark side and the suppression of it bears the heavy risk causing one day some kind of explosion with irrevocable causes. I don‘t want to frighten you, au contraire, I simply want to convince you taking a close look into the mirror to realize what you‘re able to do as a matter of survival instinct. That is exactly the key point.
Now that we‘d examined this secret chamber it‘s time to get again in the ring. In the second round we have to survive the preconditions seem to look a bit easier but the choice we have to make is much more tricky: imagine our coach is offering us as reward in the case we win the fight - honor. Nothing more, nothing less, simply honor. And while he is offering us that we hear with our other ear opened the coach of our counterparts offering his mandatories - money. The sum doesn‘t matter, as much as they want to beat us to death.
Sounds weird? Just listen in that moment to your own inner voice: might that raise a conflict in you? Do you have a corrupt vein? How high might the price be to switch the side? Ten grands? A hundred grands? Ten million bucks? Take you time to answer that. Be honest to yourself. How much idealism do you possess inside to withstand the temptation? Are you dependent? Maybe you‘re stuck in debts, the kids deserve a better school, your wife her own car or one of your beloved family members needs an urgent surgery the health insurance refuses to pay. Are you corrupt and if yes, what is your price? I know, questions like these gonna hurt but are crucial to be examined before the first gong sounds in the arena.
I heard once of a fascinating procedure taking place in Mexico where the people get the chance to face the devil on a certain day of year. In the church a half-opened coffin is standing and everyone could take a look. Instead of a corpse a mirror is placed on the bottom of the coffin so everybody taking a look inside to face the devil sees himself. A wonderful image to describe that part of our nature.
Back in the ring: have you proven being untouchable? Don‘t forget, the coach from the other side is waving at your direction with a bundle of cash. And your counterpart is swimming in money in his imagination after taking you down.
Don‘t underestimate what a human being would do for material values. It‘s the most subtle and on the other side the most perverted form of violence we‘re able to commit. Selling our soul. But I‘m presuming that you faced in the meantime your own devil still standing strong to fight for the non-material values.
The gong bells and your counterpart comes straight out of his corner looking deep in your eyes before he suddenly heads to your partner, your best wingman, you both know each other for a very long time, maybe you shared even the back bench of the preliminary school, and that bloody bastard breaks your best mate‘s neck with a loud crack still looking into your eyes. Use the pause button on your inner remote control and analyze your emotions. Confront yourself with that what‘s going on inside you. The blood is pumping at maximum speed in your head. You begin to shiver. All you want in that moment is to tear your counterpart into tiny little pieces. You want to exterminate him, wipe him of the ground, eliminate each single molecule of him. Right?
Fine, then let me tell you you‘re absolutely wrong.
Why? You're driven by revenge, to most dangerous of all feelings the human nature contains. If your mind is poisoned by revenge, you‘re lost. And the other side has automatically won. Revenge makes you blind, increasing the hate inside you, you‘re only driven by lower emotions and the higher goals you‘re fighting for will vanish completely. That‘s what your counterpart wants: driving you into the downwards spiral of revenge. Taking you down to his own bloodthirsty level. Withstand it. In the first moment the loss of your mate, your brother hurts incredible, that‘s for sure. But learn to control your emotions by not misleading you. Don‘t make yourself reproaches for what happened. It was not your fault. Keep the higher goals in spirit. Smash the attack on your emotions back. Don‘t make your counterpart stronger than he in fact is.
You‘re able to handle that? Great, that‘s all I wanted to hear. Because now you‘re able to reflect the two biggest challenges on your way to imply justified self-defense under the premise of non-violent resistance: greed in form of corruption and revenge as result of a provocation.
From now on you know that even a billion of bucks is nothing more han printed paper and you‘re strong enough to resist getting down in the dark cellars of hate you‘ll never get out out again. With that knowledge and the discipline to keep it up - prove yourself each day anew that you‘re strong enough - your victory over your counterpart is becoming reality.
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